a kernel what?: My Grandmother, Wee Kim Yean

Today I attended the cremation of my grandaunty, known all this while to me as "Mm". She was my grandfather's sister-in-law, and even though I did not know her very well, I did see her each Chinese New Year hustling about her house serving new year goodies to visitors. I'd visited her a few months back on her hospital bed, and even then she was still highly alert and mentally sound. It was hard to imagine her as an unresponsive corpse, but I saw her through the glass panel of her coffin today.

I've been talking to adults more than I've ever had in my life, and talking about things that matter a little too. Last night at Mm's wake I talked to my first uncle, Uncle Davy, proper for the first time. I asked him about his children, he asked me about my studies. We talked about his becoming a pastor, his education experiences. We talked about my spiritual life, we talked about things we hadn't talked about before. It was nice knowing my uncle better. Last night at Mm's wake I too talked to Auntie Nelly, one of the two daughters of Mm, cousin of my mum. She had flown over from Auckland to attend to her mum months back, and now she's flown over to attend her mum's wake and funeral. It was refreshing talking to her too, I talked to her about the possibility of studying overseas, asked what it was like living overseas. All I heard was good, and I am excited at life and its possibilities. Perhaps I will now think more on what I might take in the U - meaning I will now think on what I might take in the U.

The morning today was spent at Mm's last rites and cremation. It was a sobering experience for me, and it was good I went, for I had a choice actually. It got me thinking about death and the brief flicker of light that is life. Mm, also known as Maria, was Catholic in her living days and it was interesting for me to attend a Catholic funeral too. At the HDB void deck where the funeral was held, we first sang hymns which were totally unfamiliar to the Christians ones I know. I listened, and tried to understand the lyrics. And Catholicism is really as some people describe it as, rather similar to Christianity, yet vastly different. Recently I've been questioning the differences between the two.

When we went to the Catholic church which Mm and her family attended, I was quite surprised by the splendor of it. The building was really modern and rather posh too, and we proceeded to more hymn-singing and prayers which I listened to but did not partake in. It was interesting to see how Catholics worshipped, for I'd never been to any masses conducted while schooling in Catholic High. Once again, vastly different from what I'm used to. Somehow I'm a little relieved that there aren't as many rituals practiced in Christianity. Heh.

Then at around 11am we went to the crematorium, and I got to know Uncle Richard better there. He was a bit effeminate in his ways and he kept recommending I take Psychology and Sociology. Then I told him I wouldn't want to be facing depressed people all day, and that psychologists must also ensure that their personal lives were sorted out. He replied that passion exceeded all drawbacks... but a passion to counsel - its not quite in me haha, not at the moment. I think right now I know about my relatives more than I've ever have.

It got more emotional as we viewed the cremation from the uh... viewing hall. It was rather dramatic, because we were viewing from the top and then the coffin was on this machine that was tracked towards the incinerator. I must say that even though I hadn't felt much emotion till that point, the atmosphere in the hall did chip away at my resolve bit by bit. All this while the Catholics present were saying their prayers, so it might have soothed the agonies of the direct family members a little. I can't imagine what a viewing hall without religion would be like... things would definitely be more emotional and there would be little comfort I guess.

I don't know, but a strange thought entered my mind as I saw the daughter of Mm sobbing away. I'd like to think that I wouldn't cry when my mum passes away, for there is the assurance that her soul would be spending eternity with God, a most wonderful thing. But I think I would cry, because I was actually on the verge of tearing while witnessing someone who I didn't quite know enter the incinerator. I think I would cry because of the memories that I have had of my mum while she was alive. Yes and I would realise that there would be no more of these memories to be created anymore and I would feel sad about that and cry. Haha.

Well me being newly mature me and all ready to talk to adults now, I talked quite a bit to my grandmother(maternal side) today. My grandma's really aged quite a bit, she's 78 this year but I never quite realized how old she looked till today. Never remembered her hair being so white. Really wanted to talk to her extensively today, about her life story and all, because I've never. And I never had the chance to talk like that with my grandfather, her husband, because he passed away when I was 12, so me being kiddy me then didn't quite talk. So after lunch, when my mum went back to school for work I followed my grandmother back to her home (my cousin's house) to just have an afternoon chat with her.

My grandmother Wee Kim Yean is really a lovely woman. As in she's incredibly good-natured, sociable and well, cute haha. Really adventurous and bold for her age too, she would go bumping around with her younger sister (grandaunty - known to me as See Yi Poh) to faraway places like Tampines haha. It's really quite nice to see someone still having so much optimism and joy at 78, you'd think that life would have drained the colour in a person and burst her bubble. So I really quite enjoyed talking to her.

So I spent a good chunk of the afternoon talking to her, and it was great! Looked through all the old photos in her collection, heh. My grandma was quite a camwhore LOL. It's in the genes I tell you.

Well it's rather understandable that my grandma doesn't quite remember things that have happened, nor did she recall when her grandparents set foot on Singapore. She obviously didn't go sleuthing about like I did haha. So all she could remember was that her grandfather was from Fu Jian and sold salted fish in Singapore haha.

Wee Boon Chit and the Nanking Dispensary
This is Wee Boon Chit, my great-grandfather. He was university-educated and apparently very smart. According to Kim Yean he was skinny and incredibly good-natured too, he never beat them and seldom raised his voice, and just chided them nicely. He practiced medicine and set up the Nanking Dispensary (南京药房), hiring Dr. Richard Hu's father as one of the doctors. Was quite a success, this medical hall, there were long queues and Boon Chit made a lot of money. According to my mum he fused Eastern and Western medicine. They also produced miracle cure-all powder (like prickly-heat) from scratch and the panadol then which was called Lak Gao Sar (693). So what Kim Yean and her siblings did was to help out at the medical hall, grinding powder and so on. The Wee family lived on the second story of the shophouse, but it wasn't a shabby life at all haha. The shophouse was located at Cross Street, Chinatown. Boon Chit himself worked as the second in-house doctor at Nanking Dispensary. Unfortunately Boon Chit and his wife, Ang Siew Keng, did not quite store their money well enough haha. They didn't want to store all of it in the bank, so what they did was to hollow out certain parts of the walls in the shophouse to store the moolah, concealing it with false walls. And well, quite a fortune got lost when the government tore down the shophouse to reclaim the land, apparently the workers helped themselves to the Orchid notes. So... that was that. I don't know what happened to the Nanking Dispensary following the tearing down of the shophouse. Following the tearing down of the shophouse, the Wee family moved to Katong.

Ang Siew Keng, my great-grandmother

The birth of my grandmother and her siblings

Well, all I know was that Boon Chit was quite disappointed that none of his children were keen to take over Nanking Dispensary. My grandmother, Wee Kim Yean (黄金燕), was born on 5th July, 1930, and her name was given by Siew Keng. She was the sixth of seven children, born after her three elder brothers: Keng Cheng (1925), Keng Siong (1927) and Keng Swee (1928), and two elder sisters: Kim Hio (1920) and Kim Pei (1924). Her youngest sister was Kim Poh who was born in 1933 and with whom she was and still is the closest to. Keng Cheng has since passed away in Singapore, Keng Siong is still alive but is living in the US, Keng Swee went to China to work when he was young and never came back. Her elder sisters Kim Hio and Kim Pei have passed away too in Singapore at ripe old ages.

Kim Yean's childhood of luxury!
Kim Yean and her siblings were fortunate to have been born into a wealthy family. She had an extremely privileged childhood relative to the times, and never had to worry about not having food on the table. In fact, she was served by an Ah Sam, a maid, and had a rotound Malay chauffeur to drive her around in a Merc! She spent much of her childhood carefree, but had to attend lessons which were arranged for her. She took sewing lessons from a tailor, paying him $30 a month, she learnt the piano but gave up in Grade 1 (haha at least I made it to Grade 3 heh), and had tuition lessons on top of these too. Kim Yean and her siblings didn't quite like studying though, even though they had all the means too. Kim Yean only had a Primary Five education at Anthony's Girls school when she was married, Keng Siong and Keng Swee made it to Secondary 4 in Chung Cheng High school. Keng Cheng went the furthest, reaching pre-uni education and eventually went to Australia to further his studies. Kim Yean spent her childhood playing hopskotch and badminton with neighbours and friends after school and she liked eating angkoli fish and long beans. Haha. Boon Chit, their father and my great-grandfather, was understandably disappointed in his children for he had wanted them to become doctors and nurses to help out at Nanking Dispensary.

My grandmother, Wee Kim Yean, when she was in her 20s.

WWII
World War II came around when Kim Yean was 13 years old, and it was a most traumatic two years for her. Fortunately her father Boon Chit had cleverly created an underground hideout behind the Nanking Dispensary shophouse in anticipation of the shelling, and the Wee family would scramble into the basement whenever the wailing warning signals went off, which Kim Yean spontaneously demonstrates a version of haha. The Wee's survived on bread and noodles, and the two years were spent in agony waiting in the house, for it was dangerous going outside. The girls in the Wee family also had to smear charcoal on their faces to make themselves unattractive to the Japanese soldiers.

My late grandfather, Sim Cheng Kim.

Kim Yean finds love in Eng Hoon Street
I found it surprising that my grandparents only got married when they were 28, which I thought would have been an overdue age to get hitched in those times. But Kim Yean told me that it was normal then. I'm not too sure actually haha. The Wee family had a few properties on the island - besides the shophouse at Cross Street (which was torn down only after Kim Yean got married, by the way), they also owned a house in Frankel Estate, Katong, and a two-storey house along Eng Hoon Street, Tiong Bahru. And it was during Kim Yean's living stints at Tiong Bahru where she got to know this dashing young neighbour one year her junior, Sim Cheng Kim. I'm not kidding, he really was quite good-looking haha, so you all can now officially stop wondering where my good looks come from hahaha. Ask my grandma about her courtship days and she immediately starts to blush and giggle and I see suddenly the 23 year old Kim Yean before me haha. They were good friends and neighbours and hit off quite well, and Cheng Kim started asking Kim Yean out for movies at the old Capitol Building. Kim Yean also quite fancied this young man and they actually confessed their feelings to each other haha. So they went on dates and walks at the seaside hehe.

Boon Chit objects to the budding romance!
In typical fashion, Boon Chit wanted his daughter Kim Yean to marry a rich man, and he actually introduced doctors to Kim Yean to date. However, Boon Chit could not help but notice that Kim Yean had been going out on dates with Cheng Kim, a mere abacus-wielder at the Bank of China who didn't earn much. However, Kim Yean told her father that Cheng Kim was who she truly loved and Cheng Kim too even contemplated committing suicide if Kim Yean were to leave him. Boon Chit relented in the end, and my grandparents got married at age 28 at a hotel in Orchard Road! Sweet!

Kim Yean in her wedding gown!

Kim Yean with her first child.

Reality after the drama
Marriage life was not easy for Kim Yean who had now married into a Peranakan household. She was expected to know how to take care of a household. Fortunately, she had picked up cooking from her Ah Sam (maid) when she was younger. Now she had to learn new skills like grinding chilli padis as well as cope with the change in language used - the Sim family spoke Malay at home. Kim Yean gave birth to her eldest daughter, whom I know as Auntie Mary, when she was 28, then my mum when she was 29, then my eldest uncle Uncle Davy when she was 31, followed by my second uncle when she was 33 and finally the fifth child Uncle Robin when she was 39! Life was tough for the large family which survived solely on Cheng Kim's job at the Bank of China. As a result, Mary had to chip in working as a nurse, and my mum gave tuition and became a teacher. Only my eldest uncle, Davy, was able to get a university education due to financial constraints.